


Seven Minutes In Heaven

by Cinnamon_for_days



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Dorks in Love, I'm actually surprisingly proud of it, M/M, Mutual Pining, i wrote this at 2am
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 13:31:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13191138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinnamon_for_days/pseuds/Cinnamon_for_days
Summary: Penny is fed up of Simon pining after Baz, and Baz's obvious huge crush on Simon. So, she finds a spell that'll finally make them realise their feelings for each other.





	Seven Minutes In Heaven

**Author's Note:**

> This popped into my head one day, and I resisted for like three seconds before I decided ‘Yeah, I need to write this.’ Please enjoy, and leave a comment! –Cinnamon_for_days

Penny was merely seconds away from _LOSING IT._

A while ago, she had told Simon to not talk to her about Baz unless he provided a clear and _immediate_ danger.

Baz was currently providing none of these things. As far as Penny could tell, the poor boy just wanted to keep his head down and finish his eight year. Between managing his out of control crush on Simon of course (Penny was neither blind nor stupid. She could see Basilton’s major crush from a mile away.)

Despite this fact, Simon seemed intent on bringing the other boy to ‘justice’. Although, it seemed slightly different than before. After ignoring Penny’s ‘clear and immediate danger’ rule, he proceeded to talk to her about Baz. But what started as ‘plotting’ soon turned into:

“His HAIR”

“His eyes are so grey and MYSTERIOUS.”

“Penny, I think it’s illegal for someone to be that cute.”

Now  Simon barely mentioned vampires and plotting and downfalls.

He simply mooned over Baz like a love-struck teenager.

Which, Penny supposed, he technically was.

She could tune out Simon’s constant ramblings, and just focused on the fact that she’s probably ranted just as much to Simon about her crush on Micah (back when they weren’t together).

‘All in the name of love.’ She’d remind herself. After all, the two were perfect for each other. Unbeknownst to them, they even had a small ‘Snowbaz’ fanclub that had been formed in Watford at about fifth year.

Which Agatha had promptly joined once she broke up with Simon.

Penny could endure Simon’s crush.

But the worst part?

_Simon refused to admit that it was a crush!_

Every time Penny would drop hints, Simon would either ignore it completely (or maybe it did just bounce off that incredibly thick skin of his), or just tell her that he was checking Baz’s every move for plotting.

 

_NORMAL PEOPLE JUST DIDN’T DO THAT._

Which brings Penny back to the matter at hand.

Simon staring dreamily off into the distance, recounting every reason that ‘Baz was just the most unfairly beautiful person in the world, don’t you think so Penny?”

So Penny had decided to be the most obvious she could be.

“Hey, Simon?” She’d said tentatively “Do you think you maybe-y’know- like Baz?

Simon had shot off his seat and practically careered towards the door, yelling something about a History of Magick essay that Penny knew for a fact that he’s finished last week.

Penny had ended up doing most of it for him.

Sighing, Penny walked to her room, and tugged out an old, worn book from under her bed. She knew for a fact that it’d be incinerated in a magickal fire if anyone found out that she brought this from home.

She didn’t bring it because it was full of banned spells! It just had a really interesting section on the Great Goblin War. But now, just maybe, those spells might come in useful.

Pulling open the book, she tracked her finger down the dusty pages until she found the spell she was looking for.

It wasn’t like she was doing any harm! The two were meant for each other anyway.

Penny the book shut, and hid it back under the bed slat. Trixie could come in any second.

Strolling to the door, she smiled over at Mummer’s house through the window.

This was perfect.

                                                         

* * *

Simon could practically hear the song ‘Accidentally in love’ playing through his head  every time he even caught a glance  of  Baz.

Yes, maybe he had a crush on Baz.

Yes, maybe he was somewhat happy when Agatha broke up with him, so he didn’t feel like a cheater.

No, nobody was ever going to know about it.

Not even Penny.

The conversation earlier in the library was never going to happen again. Ever. He wasn’t being _that_ obvious, was he?

Simon loved Penny (platonically) to bits, he really did. But this whatever- it -is that he felt with Baz was not something that should ever be discussed.

It’d be a different story if it actually had any sort of chance of working out. He and Baz were _mortal enemies_. No matter how much Simon wished for it, that couldn’t ever be changed. Baz would always see him as the Mage’s Heir, the fight to end all fights.

Every time Simon thought about it, he wanted to punch a wall.

As soon as he’d realised that he loved Baz, he’d researched possible love spells that Baz might have cast to gain an advantage- but nothing.

If it was a love spell, it would’ve worn off by now.

Simon slammed his pen down in frustration.

“Shut up Snow.” Baz said from across the room, still reading his poetry.

Arrogant little vampire, with his _poetry_ and his _perfect hair_ and _annoyingly hard not to like personality._

“Unlike _you_ I’m actually trying to get homework done.” Simon spat back.

“Simon, that essay is due for tomorrow. I finished it two weeks ago.”

Shouldn’t he be in the catacombs or something?

Currently, Simon would prefer that Baz was in the Catacombs.

Then his pretty little face wouldn’t be so _distracting._

Simon scribbled the last word, slammed his books shut, and angrily stomped over to his bed, turning so that he as facing _away_ from Baz.

After a minute, he heard Baz put his book down, and turn out the light.

Stupidly annoyingly cute vampire.

* * *

In the morning, Baz groaned and turned over when Simon got up at stupid-o-clock and threw open the window.

He did that just to irritate Baz, Baz was certain.

Why was he in love with this idiot again?

Stupid fifth-year-self for realising it. If he hadn’t, he probably  would have offed Snow by now.

Baz ignored the pang in his chest at the thought. It’s not like it would ever happen. Simon wasn’t going to die. At their so called ‘final battle’ Baz would let Snow kill him, just like he’d always planned.

And as he died, he’d look into Simon’s eyes, and tell him exactly how he feels. No regrets.

Snow would probably be even happier that he got rid of him.

As Baz walked down to breakfast, he ignored the look Bunce gave him as he headed towards Dev and Niall. She knew he liked Snow. That much was obvious. He was actually thankful for her keeping it a secret until now.

Well, the only reason he knew that she kept it a secret was because Simon hadn’t rejected him and then killed him yet.

As he engaged in mindless chit-chat with his minions, he forced himself to think about other things.

Politickal Science.

History of Magick.

Baz was leaving the hall, and just finishing translating his favourite poem into Latin, then Greek, then Arabic, when his arm was suddenly grabbed and he was forced into darkness.

 

* * *

Simon walked slightly behind Penny as they left breakfast, his head down, and  examining  a sour cherry scone in detail.

The reason?

Tyrannus- Basilton- frickin- Pitch was walking a few meters ahead.

Simon could already feel his face turning scarlet.

But suddenly there was a loud bang, and Simon whipped his face up to see Penny holding the door of a closet closed.

And no Baz in sight.

“Penny….” Simon asked tentatively “….did you..er…just lock Baz in a broom closet?”

“Yup.” She muttered, twirling her magic ring on her finger.

“Penny…”

“Yup?” She muttered absent mindedly again.

“Why the hell would you do that?”

Penny finally looked up.

“Because you’re going in too.”

“Wait, WHAT?” Simon yelped, stumbling backwards in a desperate attempt to get away. Unfortunately, soon his back hit a wall, and he was cornered.

Before he knew it, he was landing in utter darkness.

Right on something soft.

The door slammed behind him, and he heard Penny say   ** _“Seven minutes in heaven”_** from outside the door.

The soft thing underneath Simon moved.

“Snow,” it growled “Get the hell off me.”

But Simon was already scrambling to his feet, and trying to wrench the door open.

When that didn’t work, he fired off various spells like:

“ ** _When one door closes, another one opens!”_**

**_“Love is an open door!”_ **

**_“Open sesame!”_ **

“That’s not going to work, Snow.” Baz said irritably from the floor.

“Why the heck not?”

“She used _‘Seven minutes in heaven’_. It’s a banned spell. We’re stuck in here until…”

“Until _what?”_

“Let’s just hope Bunce lets us out before then.”

“Not happening!” Came a call from the other side of the door.

“Before WHAT?”

Simon was irked now. He was stuck in a small place, with the man he was in love with, who would never like him back.

Recipe for disaster.

“Look, THE ONLY OTHER WAY OUT IS FOR US TO _KISS_ SNOW!” Baz practically yelled.

“Oh.”

Simon sank to the floor.

Now he really hoped Penny let them out.

He didn’t want to be kissed by Baz out of necessity. Although, the thought of kissing Baz was always a tempting one.

“LESS TALKING, MORE KISSING!” Penny shouted from the other side of the door.

Simon glanced at Baz.

Dammit Penny.

* * *

Dammit Bunce.

You have literally stuck Baz in a closet with the boy of my dreams, and the only way out is to kiss him.

This is the stuff of dreams.

Snow is slumped as far from Baz as possible (which still means that they’re uncomfortably squashed together- this broom closet really is tiny.), and he’s so _warm_ , and all he wanted to do right  now is pull him in and kiss the life out of him.

Baz was also currently very glad that he fed on a whole deer last night in the Wavering Woods. Otherwise this would be extremely uncomfortable.

The more he thought about it, the more this is the perfect excuse to kiss him. If he asks why Baz did it later, or drags me in front of the whole school and demands to know, he can simply say ‘It was out of necessity _Snow._ You think I want to be stuck in a cupboard with YOU forever?’

That’s it. He’s made up his mind. He’s  going to kiss him. That way he’ll have done it at least once before Sow kills him.

“Snow-”  Baz says, turning towards him.

And then _he_ kisses _Baz_

* * *

Simon surges in and kisses Baz. He can always say he had to, later. But for now, he’s just enjoying this.

Instead of pulling away, Baz kisses back, hard. His mouth is cold. Is it because he’s a vampire?  He didn’t  care. Simon loved him anyway, no matter what he is.

Their hands curled in each other’s hair as the kiss deepened, Baz letting out a low moan. Simon ending  up letting one slip in response.

Then the door is yanked open, and Penny says calmly

“You know a peck on the cheek would have sufficed, right?”

They both stare at her, their arms still around each other.

“Whatever.” She mutters “The door’s open.”

With that, she slams the door shut, and leaves.

They both stared at the door for a moment longer, and then turn to face each other.

He had to tell him how he felt.

Even when he gets rejected, and Simon hates him, at least he’ll know.

“I love you!” They both blurt at the same time.

* * *

“ I love you!” Baz says, his eyes screwed up tight.

A second passed.

Then he realised Simon said it too.

 

 

 

 

They…ah…didn’t leave the closet for another hour.


End file.
